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When he learned my favorite food was chocolate chip cookies fresh from the oven, he bought raw dough to have on hand when I came over.
On the flip side, some dates who seemed the most similar to me on paper — a journalist, say, or an NYC native — belonged in the friend zone, not the bedroom.
Some people swear by stock pickup lines. That strategy held true true offline, too. When I met a guy who shared my love of architecture, I brought him to the Grand Central Oyster Bar — a favorite, in part, because of the arched ceilings lined with Guastavino tiles.
I knew he would appreciate it as much as I do. When men shared my philosophy, I noticed. Small gestures moved me, from flowers on my birthday to personalized playlists to someone buying The Post expressly to read my work.
But I wanted to go on as many dates as possible, without sacrificing work or family or friends. That required a lot of organizing and planning — which, luckily, is something I excel at.
To avoid wasting excess mental energy on trivial stuff, I systemized my dating look. I found a go-to first-date outfit: well-fitting jeans, cute flats and a sleeveless paisley blouse that showed just the right amount of cleavage or a white eyelet shirt, if I was tan.
Instead of clearing my calendar for dates, I wove men into my plans. To avoid losing hours commuting, I scheduled the bulk of my dates near my Upper East Side neighborhood.
I got good at this. I even managed to make time for romance when I flew to Las Vegas for a conference: One fortunate dude met me for a romantic weekend of hiking, eating and putting a hotel room to good use.
There were too many guys, and not enough time. Screw that. Finally, I decided to be honest — even if it risked turning people off.
I told men that I was still hurting from my breakup, that I was afraid to be tied down. Anyone who I had a real shot with would need to understand that, and being myself made the dating process feel like less of a burden.
Dating burnout is real. Looking back, I can see the signs that I was getting a little too deep in the Hinge binge. The times I accidentally ghosted some lovely guys.
The jolt of anxiety I felt X-ing away a potential suitor. Remember that Grand Central Oyster Bar date? It turned into a second, third and fourth rendezvous — all in one week.
I was having a blast, but hesitated to commit. Are we living happily ever after? Not yet. Read Next.
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